hell yes lets make some ravioli
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Randomize
