So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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