i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
