I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
