ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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