you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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