Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Randomize
