the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
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