he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
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