he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
