she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
