Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Swine flu is the new snow day.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
