He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
