Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
