Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Randomize
