But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
