haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Randomize
