Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
