And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Randomize
