and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
