his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
