it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Randomize
