whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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