I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
