i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
