I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
