Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize
