How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
