Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
