what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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