After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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