don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Why is there bacon in the couch?
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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