dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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