your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Randomize
