I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
