positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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