This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
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