turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
He? As in you personified your dick?
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
