hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
third nipple confirmed
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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