you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize