Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
He felt like a one man threesome
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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