You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
It's official drugs can't kill me
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
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