I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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