Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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