lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Randomize
