Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
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