The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Randomize
