i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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