i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
