I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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