Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
